Two weeks ago Teen Shit found herself in some deep doo doo. Just before the end of the school quarter I got notice that she had been goofing off and not turning in work. Normally an A and B student, she had one F and two D's.
Oh. Hell. Nah!
Apparently, Teen thought turning
13 meant she was hot shit and could give zero fucks about school work.
Dickhead and I sat her down and we had a 'pull your head
out of your uber-privileged ass and put your nose to the grindstone to
bring those goddamn grades up or fuck going to California on spring
break with the rest of the family' talk. We told her she would spend her
spring break with her dad and step-mom while we spent days on the
beach, went to Hollywood and Disneyland.
Her mouth fell open
and she started crying it wasn't fair. Wrong fucking thing to say to
this Bitch. I don't give two flying fucks about Teen's definition of
fair. I don't give one flying fuck. Not a single fuck is given. 'Not
fair' is her fucking up our already paid for family spring break trip by
jacking off and being a little fucking asshole not doing her school
work. 'Not fair' is explaining to Little Shit and Baby Shit why their
older sister wasn't going to be making sand castles with us.
gave Teen one fucking chance to turn her shitty attitude around. She
had to work her ass off for the trip. All the homework she had been
ignoring had to be turned in and she had 1 week to get it all done,
bring up the low grades and maintain her remaining decent grades or the
only vacation experience she was getting would be through the pictures
of our fabufuckinglous time on the west coast.
Last Friday was
the end of her school quarter. This coming Saturday we fly off to
Orange County. I pulled up the parent portal yesterday and saw where the
little fuck must've reached far up her ass to pull the F up to a B, and
the two D's to C's. Teen asked me last night if I had seen her
grades....and was she going to vacation with us. I let her sweat a
little before I gave her the nod and told her the hard work paid off.
But if she pulled that shit again this next quarter and let her grades
slip then there wouldn't be a last minute scramble - she'd miss out on
our summer trip.
I'm not fucking around. Teen is in 7th grade.
Each year gets harder and I'll be damned if she thinks she is entitled
to everything we do as a family. My fucking kids don't get shit handed
to them on a platter...all the time... They have to fucking earn it and
earn the right to keep it. Hopefully Teen's lesson is learned. But she
is a teen so I'm not holding my muthafuckin' breath. I will be holding a
wine bottle though.