Tuesday, January 8, 2013
Intro to a Bitch's mind
Just to give you a little insight into me...I spend a lot of time laughing in my mind about a lot of things. Really, the most interesting company I keep is myself. Does that surprise you? It shouldn't. I'm fucking funny. My brain works like one might imagine a coked-up monkey would. It's all over the place. One minute I'm making fun of someone, then thinking about sex. The next minute I'm committing homicide in an extremely creative way, then thinking about sex. And in another minute I'm judging someone. Probably even flinging mental shit at them. Then I'm thinking about sex. Based on part of my thought process (sex), I probably should have been born a guy. But let me tell you, I'd have been the bitchiest man you'd have ever met.
In fact, you could say I've perfected the art of bitchery. So much so that some fucking idiots don't even realize I'm being a bitch. It's kind of like perfecting the art of sarcasm, but in a way that will really sting the hell out of a person once they get it. Other times I'm such an outright bitch that the person under attack, and even bystanders, will shrink from my fury. I'm not ashamed to say I've made people cry.
With all that in mind, let the bitchery begin!